Contrariwise

God damnit Tumblr… now all I want, at 2:30am, is a freaking glazed Krispy Kreme! I’m going to have weird hungry dreams…

God damnit Tumblr… now all I want, at 2:30am, is a freaking glazed Krispy Kreme! I’m going to have weird hungry dreams…

Dear Trolls

I am not a ‘dyke’ or a ‘yid’. I’m not a man in drag nor a failed abortion. What I AM is someone who doesn’t have to put up with someone else’s shit and ‘take it’ like I keep being told. Sorry, despite how many times it’s parroted back at me from whichever other dipshit was heard saying it first, that is NOT my job, nor the job of any other human with a pair of lips and a middle finger.

But seen as the insults have gotten further and further from the truth, it would appear the majority of you are grasping for straws, so let me help with that oh so favored and misused ‘comeback’ before it’s even been made:

Freedom of Speech is your right, but what you’ve misunderstood on your punch drunk mission to make being an insufferable asshat excusable is that it does NOT protect you from someone telling you you’re a racist, bigoted, bored prick giddily looking for digital excitement beyond furiously masturbating and crying. It does NOT protect you from someone calling you out for being the skidmark on everyone else’s otherwise pristine day. You, my dear little asshole, do not automatically get a free pass for leaking all over the rest of the world without warning, reason, or even logic when they don’t know you or care to know you.

I’m afraid the only thing it DOES protect you from, english speaking douchebags of the USA…

… is the government suing you for being one.